Yes, that's right. My precious little boy, my baby, is starting preschool in TWO DAYS!! I really thought I was going to be okay with it, I really did. But today, after going to his orientation, I realized just how hard this is going to be on me. The baby boy will be just fine, he is really excited about going to school. Me? Not so much. I know this is something that every mother has to go through, the slow and continuous process of slowly pushing the baby bird out of the nest, but I am just not ready for it yet! I have had three amazing, wonderful years of it just being my boy and me all day. I have made some incredible memories that I will never forget, and even when he was a tiny baby waking me up at all hours of the night, I made sure never to "wish" any part of it away. I never thought to myself, "I wish he wasn't a newborn anymore. I wish he was crawling. I wish he was walking. I wish yadda, yadda, yadda." (Yes, Seinfeld is one of my all-time favorite shows.) Nope, I never did that because I knew that this time was going to fly by and all I would have left were the memories.
I think the hardest part for me is that I don't know if I will get to go through all this again with another child. I don't know if I will ever have a newborn in the house that I can share late night cuddles with, and play peek a boo with, and sing silly songs with. I just don't know if that is in God's plan for me. So, I guess I will just need to learn to embrace this new phase of our lives, make some wonderful new memories, and be thankful that my little munkin man is still up for cuddles and snuggles with his mama. But maybe, just maybe, I will make a little wish that time will slow down just for a bit so my little man will stay what he is for just a little while longer....my baby.
